always hoping

i am a hoper
i am always hoping for things
full of hope
getting my hopes up
not just big things to turn out a certain way
little things too
it's just that i realized this recently
it came to my attention when i was hoping for something
then telling myself not to be silly
then being unable to not get my hopes up
and then it didn't happen
and it wasn't a big deal
it wasn't anything that was a major disappointment
just funny
and i realized i do this all the time
and sometimes it is big
mostly they're not

i am always hoping